John Whosack? Michael J. What? We couldn’t care less about the whiny dweeb protagonists of ’80s cinema. The real heroes of that high-octane age were the wheels — mechanical masterpieces that, if not perfect right off the assembly line, were amped and revamped until they were bitchin’ enough to save (or ruin) the day. We caught up with our favorites to see what they’ve been up to. Is that you, Christine? Gosh, you haven’t aged a bit!

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